The Original Birdwatcher

I just came in from setting a live-trap for cats in the backyard. The neighbor’s cat has churned out two litters of kitties over the past year, and now the first litter is starting to explore its sexuality. Kittens having kittens. Too many cats.

It wouldn’t be so bad if I hadn’t spent the last decade making my yard bird-friendly. I feel like I’ve made a deal with the yard birds, and that covenant doesn’t include feeding them to cats. Cats can find their own food—that’s why God invented dumpsters. Or better yet, pet owners can care enough about their cats to keep them safely indoors, free from fleas, cars, and mean people with traps.

I’ve been accused of hating cats plenty over the years. I think that charge would stick a little better if I didn’t have a couple of kitties camped next to me on the couch right now, two backyard waifs that tricked me into adopting them. They’ve been de-wormed, de-flea-ed, and de-outdoor-ed. As a responsible pet owner, I take care of my cats.

Many cat owners make the argument that cats are born to run, and when they run, no one can control where they go. In other words, cats can go wherever they damn well please.

Not true.

Although many cat owners deny it, cats are indeed subject to the Lafayette Parish leash law. Let’s look at said ordinance:

Sec. 10-286. Running at large. No animal shall be allowed to run at large, whether he be tagged or untagged, or whether he be on private or public property, without the owner or person in charge thereof having direct physical control over such animal by means of a leash, except where such private property is the private property of such owner or person in charge. This section shall not apply to livestock. (Parish Code 1977, § 5-12)

Think cats are excluded? The parish offers this definition:

Animal means any vertebrate creature, living or dead, domestic or wild, not including humans or fish; except that, when used in reference to rabies, it shall denote animals capable of transmitting the rabies virus.

But wait, Menou doesn’t run at large. He just goes out for a prowl now and then.

At large and stray means any animal which is not within the confines of the owner's home, dog yard, pen or fenced area or is not under the direct control of the owner or designated handler by means of a leash.

Oh, those pesky laws! Somebody ought to make a law against ‘em.

So, people who say Menou has a right to rodailler aren’t thinking with the legal half of their brain. And when my neighbors excuse their kitties ripping apart the baby birds and lizards that call my back yard home because, “Hunting is their instinct,” they might do well to remember that cats aren’t the only hunter on the block.

Cat owners who exercise an open door policy with their kitties are right about one thing: It's not Menou's fault. It's not mine, either.